Manly-Man, Sexy Nerd, or Awkward Dad? What Women Really Want in a Man Today
Times are changing, and the old idea of what women want should be tossed out with those ancient manners books! Most recently, studies suggested women are primary breadwinners in 42% of American households, and co-breadwinners in another 22.4%. As of 2018, women are having more babies than the past few decades, but they’re having them later in life and more often unmarried than used to be acceptable. Women’s dreams for their lives and futures are getting to be as diverse as the women dreaming them up.
And men, rejoice! This means it’s time to throw off the shackles of the stereotypical expectations of the ideal male. Women are interested in what you bring to the table, but we’re not talking about the bacon. We’re talking about what kind happiness, excitement, and love you can bring into their lives. If you’re not sure what that means or how to do it, no worries, we brought our matchmaking experts to break it down for you
It doesn’t sound sexy, but trust us, it’ll be the sexiest thing in the world for her! There are many subtle pressures on women everyday to fit into certain molds that can make it very hard for them to prioritize their own needs over those of others. Be the exception! Be the one who listens to her dreams and aspirations, and encourages her to pursue them by both words and actions. Knowing we are supported frees us up to love more deeply, try new things, and relax and be ourselves.
This DOESN’T mean talking over your date, bragging non-stop, or always trying to one-up your date. That’s not what makes a man interesting—in fact, most women have been on a date with “that guy” before and there wasn’t a second date. We mean, have your own interests, ambitions, and opinions. Contrary to popular belief, women don’t want a fixer-upper, they want a partner, which means you need to be your own person.
Be good communicators
Honesty, honesty, honesty. Somehow the rumor got started that manipulation is the way to sex with women, and it should have died in a raging dumpster fire long ago. Being manipulative is one of the ugliest traits a person can have. And most likely, your date has dealt with more than enough manipulative man-boys. Take the time to understand what she’s saying or asking, and then respect her enough to give her honesty. Women would waaaay rather have that, than hear you say what you “think she wants to hear.”
Know who you are (and what you want)
This is the other side to being a good communicator; after all, you can’t be honest if you aren’t self–aware. The more you know about yourself and your goals, the easier it is for you both to realize if you’re compatible or not. And best of all, self-knowledge paired with self-respect reads as maturity and quiet confidence—nothing is sexier!
Whether it’s the constant subtle trials of people-pleasing and problem-solving, the current dating hook-up culture, or the very real risk of assault, women almost always feel on guard. It’s exhausting. Few things feel as good as feeling safe. Safe to be themselves without judgment, safe to relax and be goofy, safe to rely on you sometimes. Safe, for women, doesn’t mean repetitive or boring, it means trustworthy, kind, and supportive. It means, sometimes you make the decision of where to eat when she’s just too worn out from the day. It means, sometimes you trust her to take charge because she’s the awesome woman you fell for. And it means she knows you’ll never respect her any less for needing both of those at different times.